Today we had a meeting marathon day … discussing a lot about how to get our biestmilch messages across without ending up in the middle of nowhere. After 10 years of developing and improving my communication skills I am used to the fact that I may end up in the desert, unintentional, taking a high risk of being laughed at and being taught lessons by those who know it better… and my goodness there are a lot of this kind out there. To be intimidated and give in … uff, difficult !
One day I made up my mind to follow my track regardless of getting betrayed and blamed for my notions every other day. It was Heinz von Foerster who encouraged me and made me “understand” one day that communication has nothing to do with understanding each other, but with interacting. Von Foerster uses metaphors for words that should be like hooks and arrows, that make a communicative processes successful, not like elastic balls that bounce back without leaving a mark. Communication needs objects that leave marks on the body’s surface of the other, make the other shake, startled and entangle him/her… reach out to touch him/her emotionally. You can only achieve this, if you are construing a fine and colorful communicative fabric made out of the most different languages and slangs, and forms of behavior and denkstile. Otherwise you may end up in only insulting, hurting and disrespecting the other.
This should not happen, but it happens a hundred thousand times in this multi-media based world with all its social platforms affluent of words, in a world where so many people dare to write who never would have done so before. Due to the quick access to channels of communication a web of unnecessary pain and tears emerges, beings of emotional incontinence take over the lead… I hate that, my motto is “better think twice” … We should by all differences respect each other, and remain modest.
Of course, I write this fairly moralistic post, because of an incident that happened to me today, that hurt me a lot. If I am assuming it right, the persons I have in mind while writing this paragraph, is never ever going to recognize that I am talking about him /her… and that’s for good.

with my due respect but ...
Gapingvoid